After eating my lunch today I looked at the clock and realized I had 40 minutes left before I had to be back at my desk. This is what I call a good time for Starbucks. It's the closest quiet place I can read for a few minutes, collect my thoughts. I have to cross an Amazon of a street to do this. Sure, it's not a mile wide at points and it's slightly less life threatening but fuck did it frustrate me this afternoon. I can't just cross the street right in front of my office. I have to walk all the way down to a light or all the way up. It's a little bit of a pain. Most of the time I risk traffic and scurry across the six lanes of pavement. I couldn't accomplish this today. Every time I attempted to jay-walk, an SUV would pull out of a driveway or a bicyclist would appear out of thin air (as they often do). I spent way too much time contemplating what to do. Should I just walk to the light? Should I wait a couple more minutes for an opening? What the fuck to do?! This is when I became frustrated. Why road, why must you be such an ass, why must you make me so angry and ruin my perfectly good lunch? I ended up crossing at the light. Reflecting on this now I realize how ridiculous it was to blame the road for my frustration. As I was walking to the light I asked myself "why is everything so difficult, why can't things be easy just once"? I love how I want crossing the street to be easy instead of finding my soul mate or making money. It's silly and I'm glad I realized this before I got home and possibly took out my misdirected frustration on my roommates. It's day to day and it's the little things that count. And those little things shouldn't get you down. My mantra lately has been the above: take it day to day. I can handle a day. I can handle a day of almost anything. And ending the day in a positive, non frustrated way is a little thing that will go a long way.
